Rewrite your story. Does it match the life you want?
Our lives are made up of a series of experiences, encounters and conversations. These form the basis of our current reality. This process of accumulation begins from a young age and continues to this day, as we absorb and take on the messages, examples, things we are told and taught, feel and witness. Parents, teachers, friends and peers, media, failures, successes are just a few examples of where you can trace it back to the root .
E.g. Someone unsuccessfully trying to lose weight via the restrictive diet route for a number of years is likely to have a developed a story that has them believing that they are lazy, greedy and lacking in willpower. So every time they embark on anew diet their story is perpetuated and they're provided with evidence to show that it's true! Yet it's not. The issue right there is with the method of weight loss itself. Not with the dieter!
Your current story has a number of or a single root. The mind makes a decision based on something in the past, that doesn't mean it's also based on truth though!
In college I was told by a guy that I had chunky thighs and could do with toning them up a bit. At the time I was very insecure about my body and was on the cusp of a phase in my life where I battled with food, my body, distorted body image, eating disorders and disordered eating. Were my thighs chunky? 100% NOT! Did I take the thoughtless comment of that guy as the truth? YES, and I then based the story of the following phase in my life, until my early twenties, around it and still to this day I have to check myself about distorted body image, although I'm super aware of it so that 'story' doesn't sabotage my peace. happiness, freedom and success anymore. (Step no 1 in re-writing your story is to delve deep and be willing to discover the truth, no matter how uncomfortable)
Our ego's main job is to keep us safe. Often we'll make a decision, usually on a subconscious level, to believe, be or act a certain way or do or not do certain things by way of protecting ourselves from the imminent 'danger'. In the case of my college story, against chunky thighs! I could take this explanation further and explain thoughts and beliefs, but let's stick to the 'story'!
As pre-mentioned, your no 1 power tool in penning a new life story is always, always going to be 'self knowledge'. You can't address and reform something you know nothing about. No need to stay there for long though, just enough time to gather the relevant info.
Also, this is not permission to jump right into an episode of low level self attack. What's done is done and your power isin this very moment. So resist the need to spew resentment, regret, disappointment, fear and anger into the space.
Our main purpose of delving deep is to rise up even higher than before so keep your attitude and vibration high, high, high!
Your life as it is right now is based on the story you tell yourself and other people. So if you're not satisfied or fulfilled by all or certain areas of your life, change your story.
It'll only take a few minutes. Share with me the following. BTW don't over think this and definitely do not vet it. Write the first thing that comes about the first topic that arises. I promise to read and respond to you with feedback about your NEW story with 1 critical pointer to help you.
1st paragraph: Your old story (be honest)
2nd paragraph: Your new story! (be creative!)
What if your new story began unfolding as quickly as next week? no really, what if????